I’m afraid of the world. I’m afraid I can’t help it, I’m afraid I can’t

Post soundtrack
Im afraid of Americans by Davod Bowie and Nine inch nails

You know that saying that goes “The only thing we have to fear, is fear itself.”  I hate that saying, probably because it’s true.

Fear is a bitch, biggest bitch ever.

When I was little I feared the fun things like the dark, fire, snakes and sharks,  I guess they are common fears for kids.  Those are nice fears, the PG version of fear.  When you get older fear turns into this emotional inside shit.  I mean you can actually fear everything on this earth, that’s so fucked up.

We all fear the unknown, I don’t think I know anyone who doesn’t own that fear in some way.  And why wouldn’t they?

I have many fears, especially fears about the future, which is funny because none of it has actually happened.  Unless I somehow get to the place I fear all by myself.  I’m very good at that.  My shrink call its ”healthy” to be fearful, or I wouldn’t be human or some shit like that.

There are people who are optimists and able to live in the now, then people like me who are so good at really thinking the worst things at all times.  I’m talking real obscure shit.

Like if I was in a plane crash, I’m afraid of how cold the water would be.  I call it optimistic pessimism.  I am optimistic enough to assume I will survive, you know, a plane crash, but   then impending doom of pain awaits.  I hate to be cold.

I probably should stop writing now.

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